that one ex

Got this from an FB status...

That one Ex that we thought would actually last. That one Ex that we would ditch our friends for. That ex that made us smile like an idiot. That ex that you wouldn’t want to say goodbye to. That ex that showed us “Forever” doesn’t exist. That ex that treated us like shit. That ex that we regret dating. That ex that you wished was never an ex. That Ex that showed us the example of what an ex looked like. & That one ex that taught us a Lesson.

=now, i still can't believe it.. iv'e been suffering this burden for 2 years..and now, i just laugh whenever memories come and visit me.maybe they're just reminding me about how an asshole am i 2 years ago.. ^_^

 

cuz it hurts skin deep

It's really amazing to think how much I could be in love with someone. I remember that smile you brought upon my face. Those "good morning" and "goodnight" messages that made me feel so special. I sacrificed so much for you; my heart, my friendships, and my time just to be with you. I felt you drifting away, your good morning and goodnight messages turned into just a simple "hi" and "bye" At times

, nothing at all. I saw it coming, and it did. There was nothing I could do to change your mind. You broke my heart skin deep. Now looking back I wonder if everything we had was real. I really wonder if you meant all the things you said to me. Or was it just your way of luring me in and then turning your back on me once you got bored? I had such strong feelings for you but you chose to leave.

one day...

One day, you're gonna miss my text messages I give you.
One day, You're going to miss how I used to worry about you when you're out too late or when ur not feeling well. 
One day, when I'm gone, you're going to miss how you actually had someone that actually wanted you.




 And when I'm not there anymore, You're going to miss me...

When I decided to love you, I loved you like we’ll be together forever. It didn’t cross my mind that we might end. I see now that first love is the most powerful kind. Because it’s innocent and knows no boundaries. You’re the first one to still my heart. And for that, I will never forget you. I now know why God advices us to be with one person for the rest of our lives. Were deeply attached and its not natural to rip loose.  I realize now that breakups cause more than pain. When we broke up, it built walls and scars, and it created fear for future love. It is important to  me for you to know that you played a huge influential part of my life. Looking at our past has rebuild how much our relationship shaped who I am today. I write this letter because I want you to know you’re a wonderful person. We simply could not continue to pull each other in direction neither of us ought to go. Our past overlapped for a time but eventually split apart.

 A tree cannot grow beneath another tree’s shadow. so I guess I have to find a place for my roots to grow. In a position where I can soak up my own sun. you represent friend who was there during the most fragile part of my life. and you let me go so I could grow. Thank you for putting up with me. and for giving  me the hard times. You will always hold a place in the deep part of my heart. Thank you for allowing me to discover who I am. And to follow my greatest passion. I know you will do the same.. :)

u know what?(oct 14,2011)

u know what? yesterday, i realized  and felt amazing emotions. having you in my life is yeah! mazing. all this time, i was focusing on you, ur reactions towards me,, on how you approach me, and yeah , i mean it, u seldom compliment me with how i face the world and ur own outlook towards my whole anatomy. while im busy considering those things , i didn't notice the things behind you. as what my friends said "sala mu kay gapalipod ka man, paano ka na ka abot xa imu pakadtuan kung pirme ka ga balik xa imu gn halinan?, gina palibot ya lang ka dorg aw? those ouchful words slapped me both sides of my face. and yesterday maybe was God's way of proving and making me realize that there's so much more in this world aside from you. that i deserve more compliments and reasons from people being proud of having me in there lives. ill share some: my friend asked me if he can court me, the friend of my best friends brother is really interested on me, and my former classmate shares her  (PS: 'twas my tomboy classmate whose really into me when were still in elem.)reasons why i was once the apple of her eye.
They never get tired of complimenting me, and my family. like when i'm with these people, im always fed up with those nice and flattering words from them. that lucky-you-if-you-have-me-in-your-life-im-famous-important-attractive-almost perfect- 5ml vial feeling is administered on me. I'm just upset cuz people in my life used to treat me like a princess.  i was always the first in line. the first priority. but sadly its U and HER who treats me as if i'm like an old fashioned foolish ugly bitch whose always there to help u with ur mess but eventually always ends up crying..